a tennis ranking is when they subscribe a number to you that tells you your worth as a human being...for example...a ranking of seven means you are better than most but still have six to go...
...all winter long i measured my penis and articulately searched the news paper to discover my worth as a human being...
then it happened...like a pig flying out of your ass...the mother fuckers decided to not rank me...i mean...eleven wins in my first year and no ranking...indeed , a communist plot .
of course i blamed it on the aliens...either that or big foot...anyhow...the world continued to spin in eighteen thousand ways at the same time...and a spaniel remained a boy's best friend .
as for the rest...they could all bugger themselves all the way to a distant universe...and break their teeth tripping over the finish line in the special olympics .
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